In-laws and my dog

edondero · Post by **edondero** » Sun Mar 23, 2008 7:16 pm

WHY DOES MY FAMILY HATE MY DOG?
She is not a bad dog by any means, she is actually in the top percentile for well-behaved shorthairs, but she is still a shorthair nonetheless. I don't tell my brother in law how to raise his kid; he shouldn't tell me how to raise my dogs. They are constantly complaining that the dogs are obnoxious or ill-behaved. In my house my dogs do as I have them trained to, and I don't expect to make exceptions. I treat my dogs like family (most days I'm on my own and they are all I have) so if I want to give them half my Easter ham right at the dining table then I will. If I didn't discipline her for inching mighty close to the edge of the table then no one else needs to tell me to do it!

Just venting really, but I bet I'm not the only one with this problem...

Post by **ezzy333** » Sun Mar 23, 2008 7:20 pm

Not sure you have a problem. It just makes sense that things you do when you are by yourself might be a little different when other people are there. Do you eat Easter dinner in your shorts? Might the in-laws say something if you did? A little consideration on both sides usually works well.

Ezzy

edondero · Post by **edondero** » Sun Mar 23, 2008 7:29 pm

oh no, they are relentless. all day, every visit. even when the dogs aren't doing anything at all, they want to insult them for doing that. or for their intelligence, etc. My sister told me she couldn't believe my dog could hunt, she couldn't picture it.
But then again, as the youngest in the family, I've always been picked on one way or another. Just a little defensive when you start to insult my dogs!

mtlee · Post by **mtlee** » Sun Mar 23, 2008 7:43 pm

Its ok, I've got a similar story. One day a girl in my class wanted to see my shorthair so her and her boyfriend stopped by after class. Well Maggie had been outside in her kennel from 7:30am - 4pm. I opened the kennel door, she waited to exit until I told her "ok" like she always does and then this girl walks in the back gate bends down and starts yelling baby talk at her! Maggie takes off and all but tackled the poor girl

I told her sorry but I mean the dog had been in a kennel all day and then you started with the baby talk (which for some reason drives her INSANE...she flips out)...what'd you expect??

To this day if something is mentioned about my dog she makes sure whoever is around knows that my dog is the most disobedient, bad mannered, stupid dog EVER!!!! She obviously doesn't know any commands

Besides...........

Sit,Down,Come,Whoa,Fetch,Steady to Wing Shot and Fall and some basic handling for blind retrieves....what a dumb dog!!!

markj · Post by **markj** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:07 am

I put the dogs into the kennel when folks visit that do not like dogs.

Never trust a person that dont like dogs, ever. Learned it the hard way....

zzweims · Post by **zzweims** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:16 am

My in-laws are the same. Whenever they visit, the dogs get locked up in the kennels. But still they complain--too noisy, too much work, too much time/money spent on dogs--etc. So how can the mum-in-law blame me when SHE left the back door open, and SHE left food on the counter? Imagine her horror when she walked into the kitchen and found a HORSE helping himself to the leftovers

She didn't complain nearly as much about the dogs after that

Aline

http://sitekreator.com/zzfarms

markj · Post by **markj** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:18 am

and found a HORSE helping himself to the leftovers

Now that was funny, dont care who you are

need a pic of that

hosejockey2935 · Post by **hosejockey2935** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:47 am

My family (mainly her family) can't believe my Brit has the ability to hunt.
I get the "oh he's so wild, there is no way he has the patience to do it...he's such a spaz!" I've bit my tongue more than once!

I can't hunt every single minute in Minnesota. It just so happens that he's a house/family dog before a hunting dog. He has a lot of time running around in the backyard, chasing tennis balls, and laying on the couch. None the less he's a Brittany and LOVES it when people visit. I've found if you put the dog in the kennel they'll think your cruel to lock him up like that. You really get it from both angles!

People that don't have/like dogs, just don't get it. Plain and simple! I have friends with a 170lb great dane. They are my friends and their dogs are my dog's friends also. I don't mind when the Dane wants to be my lap dog on the couch, he's cute...its funny, he's a big dog! Dogs will be dogs!

There is somebody on the forum with a tagline that reads "I like dogs better than most people" Or something like that. Thats the truth!

~tom

Buckeye_V · Post by **Buckeye_V** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 10:15 am

Some people that come to our house do not understand that this house is also my dog's house and I (emphasis on I) am the top dog. My house, my rules. If you insult my dogs, you are insulting my family. However, if my dogs are rude I am the first one to give the correction, or just kennel them up.

I have neighbor that can't get her head around birddogs actually hunting birds. She asked me one day of the dogs would catch and killa "tweaty bird." I said, given the chance abosultely. They are, after all, predators with a prey drive. She shuddered. She doesn't come around any more - and I like that.

Justin

zzweims · Post by **zzweims** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 10:45 am

I have a pet peeve slightly opposite in nature: Just because my husband and I are 'dog people,' that doesn't mean we love all dogs all the time. My own dogs are not allowed on the furniture (except the bed, and only if invited), they are not allowed to terrorize the barn cats or the birds in the quail pen. And there will be no begging from the table. Oh, and any dog that even thinks of barking at or otherwise annoying one of the horses, will get a come to Jesus meeting pronto.

Yet people come to our home and think nothing of it when their dogs do these things. We even had two people bring their dogs to our wedding! Ours, of course, were in a boarding kennel.

Aline
http://sitekreator.com/zzfarms

Kmack · Post by **Kmack** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 11:02 am

I have worked hard to avoid teaching SIT to my GSP but it seems that everyone who comes in fancies themselves a trainer and SIT is always the first thing they try.

How do you explain to people you don't want your dog to sit everytime you try to give/teach a command without them taking offense?

prairiefire · Post by **prairiefire** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 12:46 pm

zzweims wrote:I have a pet peeve slightly opposite in nature: Just because my husband and I are 'dog people,' that doesn't mean we love all dogs all the time. My own dogs are not allowed on the furniture (except the bed, and only if invited), they are not allowed to terrorize the barn cats or the birds in the quail pen. And there will be no begging from the table. Oh, and any dog that even thinks of barking at or otherwise annoying one of the horses, will get a come to Jesus meeting pronto.

Yet people come to our home and think nothing of it when their dogs do these things.

I'm the very same way. I'm very conscious of our puppy's behavior in the house. There are rules to be followed and if his brain is swirling with the commotion of guests, he's crated for a short time out. Meanwhile, my in-laws bring their dogs into our house and don't think anything of the darned things leaping on and off of my nice leather furniture, barking at and scaring little kids, sleeping in my bed when we offer it (never mind that I'm mildly allergic to dogs--a fact which they are very aware of). Unfortunately, my father-in-law believes he's never in the wrong, so I don't even waste my breath. But it sure would be nice if they would ever--just once--correct that dog. He's perfect in their eyes. In reality, he's the most spoiled rotten dog I've ever met. My brothers-in-law's dogs aren't much better either.

Unless someone asks for my advice, I never tell people how they should raise their kids or dogs. And in your own home, of course--you make the rules. But it sure would be nice if guests in our home could be a bit more respectful of our "house rules".

Ugh. In-laws--don't get me started... :roll:

BigShooter · Post by **BigShooter** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:08 pm

Ann Landers, Emily Post, Miss Manners ... where are you when we need your advice? Lack of consideration and respect for others = poor or no "human" training.

airman · Post by **airman** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:23 pm

If someone is comming over that is not a dog person, to bad so sad. My two vizsla's are not going outside because of you. If they are family i could care less, I'll show you the door no matter who you are!

Post by **Greg Jennings** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:40 pm

prairiefire wrote:Unless someone asks for my advice, I never tell people how they should raise their kids or dogs.

That is a very wise policy. It's what my dad tried to raise me to do. I aspire to it, but sometimes forget and fall short.

Greg J.

prairiefire · Post by **prairiefire** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:52 pm

Yeah, it may be a wise policy--but I swear it's shortening my life...

ohiohuntinweim · Post by **ohiohuntinweim** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 1:53 pm

Its the Inlaws...'nuff said!!

I typically don't expect my dogs to do anything different when family or friends come over. If I know that someone is truely bothered by large dogs (my motherinlaw

) I will do my best to keep the piece without punishing my dog for doing what is normal.

*She has a lg bed next to the entertainment center that we can "send" her to to keep her out from under foot. We might keep her off the couch when M-I-L is around, but thats about it!!!

Oh we bought a pub style dinner table so that the table top would always be above the dogs head...unless you have a Great Dane!!! We just adapt to life with dogs

jcbuch · Post by **jcbuch** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 3:29 pm

i guess i have it the opposite, my mother lives near by us and comes over everyday to let the dogs out, when we are at work. My inlaws watch the dogs when we go out of town.

splucinski · Post by **splucinski** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 5:02 pm

edondero wrote:WHY DOES MY FAMILY HATE MY DOG?
She is not a bad dog by any means, she is actually in the top percentile for well-behaved shorthairs, but she is still a shorthair nonetheless. I don't tell my brother in law how to raise his kid; he shouldn't tell me how to raise my dogs. They are constantly complaining that the dogs are obnoxious or ill-behaved. In my house my dogs do as I have them trained to, and I don't expect to make exceptions. I treat my dogs like family (most days I'm on my own and they are all I have) so if I want to give them half my Easter ham right at the dining table then I will. If I didn't discipline her for inching mighty close to the edge of the table then no one else needs to tell me to do it!

Just venting really, but I bet I'm not the only one with this problem...

Were you at their house or yours when this happened? If you're in their house, abide by their rules. If they are in your house, they have to abide by your rules.

PrairieGoat · Post by **PrairieGoat** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 6:05 pm

I like to keep it simple.....my house, my rules!!! I have one set of rules that my dog is expected to follow whether or not someone is visiting or not. I will not put him out unless acting up. He is a 7 month old pup and needs "time out" occassionally, not to mention he is one of those dreaded, hyper GSPs!

I also expect anyone else's dog that comes over with them to follow my rules.

CherrystoneWeims · Post by **CherrystoneWeims** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 8:43 pm

zzweims wrote:My in-laws are the same. Whenever they visit, the dogs get locked up in the kennels. But still they complain--too noisy, too much work, too much time/money spent on dogs--etc. So how can the mum-in-law blame me when SHE left the back door open, and SHE left food on the counter? Imagine her horror when she walked into the kitchen and found a HORSE helping himself to the leftovers

She didn't complain nearly as much about the dogs after that

Oh Aline that is so funny!!!!

I have my Out Laws visiting as we speak. UGH Mother Out-law doesn't like the dogs. I do invite Pearl to come and sit next to me on the couch but Mother Out-law doesn't like it and will make comments about how Pearl is such a big dog, why does she suck on her stuffed toys, blah blah blah.

As far as the open door I have to constantly tell the Out-Laws to keep gates closed! And they still keep leaving them open. And Pearl is in heat!!

Oh and one more gripe. The Out-laws are such slobs!! When they eat at the table they drop food all over the fronts of themselves AND on the floor and chairs. So when the dogs come up to them and start licking the fronts of them when they leave the table they don't like it. They also don't like it when the dogs are tempted by the food on the floor under the table while we are eating dinner. Poor dogs can smell and see the food on the floor and it just really isn't fair to them.

My Mother Out-law also complains about how much money, time, etc that Her Yankee daughter-in-law spends on the dogs. LOL I just bring up how much money, time, etc. that her son spends on his airplane! That shuts her up.

CherrystoneWeims · Post by **CherrystoneWeims** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 8:54 pm

Yet people come to our home and think nothing of it when their dogs do these things. We even had two people bring their dogs to our wedding! Ours, of course, were in a boarding kennel.

LOL This brings to mind the people who think that just because I have a bunch of my own dogs and have a small kennel that I can board their dog. I will in a pinch help out a very close friend if they have an emergency and can't get a spot in a boarding kennel. But some people take advantage!! My son's soccer coach had a Weim. He was going on vacation and told me that he couldn't get a place to board the dog. At the time I had an empty run and so I told him I could board the dog. My neighbor and a fellow Weim breeder has a boarding kennel so I asked her what she charges for boarding. Come to find out he had a reservation at her place and cancelled it when he found out I could take the dog. I charged him what she charges. LOL He never asked if I could board the dog again. People think that just because I have my own kennel that I will board their dogs for free!

prairiefire · Post by **prairiefire** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:21 pm

Outlaws? OMG, that is too funny...

We should compare family trees. There has to be a connection there somewhere...

I know I said I don't usually hand out unsolicited advice, but--from one long-suffering daughter-in-law to another, I've always found that I'm better able to tolerate my in-laws if I medicate myself heavily with alcohol. Then their behavior seems funny, instead of offensive.

Hopefully they'll be gone soon!?! Hang in there!

gar-dog · Post by **gar-dog** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:26 pm

My Mother-in-law was annoyed at me when I asked her not to play tug-of-war with the dog. She is a dog person, but her husband is not. With an energetic puppy it's kind of a pain having people over.

The worst is when the dog jumps up on people and kids and they pet her and kiss her. I will not pet my dog if she jumps up but say "down." I then pet her while standing. Some people say "it's okay, I don;t mind" and I have to say that I mind and I am trying to train her not to jump on people.

As for dinner-time, I crate the dog during our dinner.

cesarike · Post by **cesarike** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:34 pm

I used to put up with the in law crap. I would get it coming and going. Mother in Law always brings her little dachshund whenever they visit. This is not a problem for me as long as they understand that their dog is the one that will have to be kenneled up if any kind of problem arises.

Father in law can't stand the fact that the dogs like visitors and are used to being treated decently. On one visit he kicked my Golden, that was it for me I kicked him right back and "in the most polite way" told the S@B where to go.

End of problem

CherrystoneWeims · Post by **CherrystoneWeims** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 9:37 pm

prairiefire wrote:Outlaws? OMG, that is too funny... We should compare family trees. There has to be a connection there somewhere...

I know I said I don't usually hand out unsolicited advice, but--from one long-suffering daughter-in-law to another, I've always found that I'm better able to tolerate my in-laws if I medicate myself heavily with alcohol. Then their behavior seems funny, instead of offensive.

Hopefully they'll be gone soon!?! Hang in there!

LOL Probably not related as they are from TX.

Oh I have found that I can take Rescue Remedy or some Gelsimium and that will help with the stress. If I medicate myself with alcohol I will most likely tell Mother-Out-Law off and kick her out of my house. I tend to say it like it is anyways. Guess it's the New Englander in me. We tend to pull no punches and say what we are thinking.

My Father-in-Law really isn't so bad. He's pretty quiet and he really likes the dogs. It's just hard since he is up there in age and I have to baby-sit him. He came earlier and was here a week before she arrived. So he will be here for 2 weeks and she will be here for 1 week. They leave on Thurs.

Post by **ezzy333** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 10:24 pm

We should save this thread for all of your kids and their wives in the future. Sounds like some of you are in the sauce already. You are trying to tell us how much more important your dogs are than your family and I just don't buy it for a minute. But if its true then I wonder if anyone knows where we lost our sense of common courtesy and respect for our fellow man and family.

Ezzy

prairiefire · Post by **prairiefire** » Mon Mar 24, 2008 10:45 pm

ezzy333 wrote:Do you eat Easter dinner in your shorts?
Ezzy

Funny that this was the infraction you should mention. My in-laws actually did show up for Easter at my place a few years ago in shorts. And not cute spring shorts appropriate for a sunny day. We're talking dirty denim shorts, t-shirts with holes in them, the works. So glad I spent three days cleaning the house and eight hours in the kitchen, so that they could plow silently through dinner in 15 minutes.

I'll bend over backwards to make someone feel comfortable in my home, but not everyone GETS IT--and sadly that includes a few of my in-laws.

Oh, and I'd love to save this thread for my kids. The message? You're not just marrying your spouse, you're marrying their family.

Sorry if this sounds grouchy--but courtesy is a two-way street.

edondero · Post by **edondero** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 5:29 am

ezzy, get a sense of humor! maybe if you knew my family you might agree and like the dogs more.

gar-dog · Post by **gar-dog** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 6:04 am

Yeah, ezzy - this is one of the funnier threads in awhile. Why cr_p on it!

My mother-in-law always has to bring something way too big to travel on the plane for a visit - once a giant plywood wreath lawn ornament - we were like WHAT? And you cannot get Ranch Style Beans in NJ, so she will bring up like 2 cases - well guess who has to carry the luggage??? (actually that is worth it.) She and her husband each have breathing apperatus and take up a whole floor with all of their doo-dads. I love them to death but it's like Ma and Pa Kettle came to life.

And their little poodle, Missy.... don't get me started.....

markj · Post by **markj** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 8:07 am

I wonder if anyone knows where we lost our sense of common courtesy and respect for our fellow man and family.

The 90s did it

Post by **ezzy333** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 8:18 am

If we have to get our kicks by making fun of people we are in bad shape. I am glad to get the advice to get a sense of humor as I normally hear that I can't be serious. But I admit I find little humor in people making fun of other people and especially their own family when they aren't present. If its really just good humor then the people you are making fun of should be included. And if that makes you uncomfortable then it probably isn't humor.

Ezzy

gar-dog · Post by **gar-dog** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:38 am

It is an endless cliche to pick on the in-laws and has always been a source of humor in our culture. The thread started with a woman in her early twenties venting a bit. I bet she felt better after everyone chimed in to support her that she "wasn't alone." Half of the stories are outrageous and the thread is full of smiley faces. We've all got our in-law stories to share, and I am sure at the end of the day most in-laws are dearly loved, especially after the test of time.

This is a fun, light-hearted thread. The only "ill-humor" seems to come from your chastizing and holier than thou perspective. Just enjoy the thread and give us your best story! I know you got 'em.

Cheers,
Gary

CherrystoneWeims · Post by **CherrystoneWeims** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 9:47 am

Ezzy, when I posted about my Mother-Out-Law that was just the surface! This is a woman who from Day 1 would insult me to my face. She insults total strangers also. Heck on Easter while I was making gravy she made the comment that she had never seen me stir a pan! This was right in front of my mother and other friends. Their heads just swiveled and one of them almost burst out laughing. You have to know that I used to do some catering and made cheesecakes professionally! I was the person who when my husband was in residency anyone who didn't have family around would come to OUR house for holiday dinners.

LOL And this comes from a woman who can't even make a boxed cake!

wems2371 · Post by **wems2371** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 10:16 am

I've got to agree with everyone about lightening up. Not too many people said they actually verbally chastized their in-laws, locked them out in the kennels (although I'm sure they would have liked to

), or hidden the oxygen cannisters. They've kept their feelings inside(for the most part), but now have found a fun place to vent and share like stories. Cheaper than a therapist and free humor

for the rest of us.

I am fortunate, like someone else posted earlier, that my parents love my dogs and view them as grandkids. When I'm gone on vacation, I have free babysitters, and I only have to drive 10 miles to get there.....and I soooooo appreciate that. They do drive me crazy in other respects. Most the time, I stuff it down and talk it out with my husband. Once in a while, when my feelings are severely hurt, I lash back to make it clear I won't be walked on anymore. In my opinion--YOU EARN RESPECT AND IT'S A TWO WAY STREET I give them plenty of leeway (?) because they are my family (and I'm not perfect either) and helped to get me where I am.........but that doesn't mean they've earned the right to treat me or what's important to me badly for the rest of my life.

Sorry I'm not so funny. But I don't live in the Leave it to Beaver family either, so I appreciate the other posts. Carry on. Denise

CherrystoneWeims · Post by **CherrystoneWeims** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 12:21 pm

gar-dog wrote:Yeah, ezzy - this is one of the funnier threads in awhile. Why cr_p on it!

My mother-in-law always has to bring something way too big to travel on the plane for a visit - once a giant plywood wreath lawn ornament - we were like WHAT? And you cannot get Ranch Style Beans in NJ, so she will bring up like 2 cases - well guess who has to carry the luggage??? (actually that is worth it.) She and her husband each have breathing apperatus and take up a whole floor with all of their doo-dads. I love them to death but it's like Ma and Pa Kettle came to life.

LOL I can just picture the lawn ornament!! My MIL brings me her cast-offs such as really old, broken, lead filled toys from my husband, dishes that have chipped edges, etc. She is cleaning out her junk at her house and pawning it off on us. :roll:

markj · Post by **markj** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 12:45 pm

What the heck is an In Law?

I dont have any

now who do I have to pick on?

only myself......

airman · Post by **airman** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 12:51 pm

I don't even let my monster in law over. My father in law is a diffrent story. He divorced the monster a long time ago and i don't blame him, she's a cat person. How can you not like dogs? Just stupid!

edondero · Post by **edondero** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 1:03 pm

i find cat people funny. can we pick on them next?

airman · Post by **airman** » Tue Mar 25, 2008 1:20 pm

Thats sounds like a new fun thread! Cat people, why are they so weird?

markj · Post by **markj** » Wed Mar 26, 2008 8:01 am

I once read that if you died in the house your dog would lay down beside you and go with you, a cat would eat you........

Gun Dog Forum

In-laws and my dog

In-laws and my dog

Or...

Re: In-laws and my dog